There may be something stranger, but I’m not sure what it could be.

I am suffering from what my husband calls ‘paralysis by analysis’. It used to be his catch phrase when he was in property development and he was proud that he did not suffer from it. As he put it, he was able to make decisions without getting too bogged down with analysing all the myriads of information at his disposal, or as I see it, he is inclined to do things first and think about them later.

I am not like this… at all. Maybe he is right, maybe I do over think things. I am certainly feeling that way tonight and it irks me that it is over something so trivial. I have been saving jars and planning tea light lanterns for a very long time now, so long in fact that summer came and went without me getting them done (one of the rare downsides to making most of your food from scratch – no jars to re-use). Well we have now done enough visiting of family and friends (about the only times I can justify buying prepackaged baby food) that I have enough little jars to be getting my lanterns made. I have the lace I intend to use to decorate them, I have the paints I intend to use to colour the lace, I have the twine I will use to hang the finished pieces from our apple trees, yet I can’t seem to figure out which lace to use on which jars and exactly what shades I should make them. It is irksome, I am, well, irked!

The remarkable thing about all of this really is not my inability to decide how the finished product will look, my inefficacy in the decision-making area is already well established, rather that I am using housework as my form of procrastination. I have managed to convince myself that I absolutely can not start any painting or gluing or stringing until the house is tidy. Please do not be confused into thinking that this means there is any real housework being done here, there isn’t. Heaven forbid that any procrastination tactics of mine should actually result in something productive or useful but the thought is there. See, this is a new thing, maybe all this research (yes I am still calling it that) that I have done is starting to change the way I think… maybe tomorrow I will be inspired to actually clean something,,, maybe… well you never know, stranger things have happened!

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Goals Update – Weeks 3 and 4 – Lesson: Sweetness is a matter of opinion

For the first time since starting these weekly updates I am not hesitant to write one. Maybe it is because I ran out of time to do last weeks one and so have had a fortnight off, so to speak, or the fact that although I was supposed to weigh myself this week I can’t, my scales are broken. Well not broken so much as they are showing an error message that I can’t get rid of and don’t know how to fix. Admittedly I could probably find instructions on how to correct it if I looked online but, well, I haven’t, so there you go, I have no idea if I have lost any weight but I don’t really care right now.

I have however been working hard on my 30 day challenge and I figure that has to being doing something good. I can feel a difference in the conditioning of my muscles, in that my recovery time is already getting shorter (I can walk the next day now where I could barely stand the day after I started) and I am doing each group of exercises in one go now, not having to split them up like I did at first. My neighbour who I haven’t seen in a few weeks also commented that I looked like I had lost weight and that my face looked thinner so I am going to take that as a win! Ok so she didn’t have much to go on as I was dressed in my baggiest pyjamas at the time but I think the face comment is still valid… I’m sticking with that.

After a comment on one of my posts I have purchased some Agave nectar to use as a sugar substitute. It is lower G.I. apparently and can help prevent blood sugar spikes. I am very keen to give this a go as I still struggle with the whole giving up sugar thing but am tired of the sugar rush/sugar hangover cycle I am in. I am trying and I am consuming less, but it is hard – way WAY harder than I found giving up smoking all those years ago. By comparison giving up cigarettes was a piece of cake and the rewards of improved health and more money in my pocket, sweet. There’s my problem right there, sugar is easy and rewarding and I even use it to describe how I feel about totally unrelated things. It is so hard to change that mindset of sugar being yummy and good to sugar being unnecessary and toxic in the quantities I sometimes eat. Baby steps.

I think I have done about as much “research” that I can on housekeeping systems, I doubt there is anyone alive who knows the content of FlyLady‘s website better than me right now, probably not even Marla (the actual FlyLady) herself as she is not the only one who writes for the site. Trouble is reading about cleaning my house doesn’t actually clean my house (darn it). I have almost finished compiling my home management binder and have filled it with free printables from this fabulous site run by Ginny at Organizing Homelife. I have most of them filled out with the relevant information for our family too so there really are no more excuses for doing no more than the bare minimum to keep the house livable. I had a great conversation a while back with a friend (the other significant participant in the wedding from a few weeks back) and he made the comment that making ‘to do’ lists to help fight procrastination is in itself a form of procrastination. This is absolutely true and I am absolutely guilty. I have now made all my ‘to do’ lists, however, so I no longer have the delaying tactic of sitting down to write the day’s plan, it is done. Hubby – who will be, from now on, referred to as Action Man or A-man for short – is heading off for a month long deployment this week so I won’t even have him as a distraction for a while. He is very distracting. It seems it is time to get my clean on.

Of course having a clean and tidy house will allow me to spend more time doing some crafty creative things and as I have so many projects that I am ready to start and a fair few that need finishing too the incentive is well and truly there. I have been asked by a friend to give her some feedback on the work she is doing towards her masters too so I am really looking forward to using my brain for something other than figuring out where that smell is coming from or how many carrots I will need for the weeks meals. I am also looking forward to reclaiming the office for it’s intended purpose instead of the laundry/wardrobe extension it has become.

I have managed to pay off a further $46 of my credit card debt! Yay! Total paid $206. It would have been more but I needed supplies for my latest project and I also paid myself for the workouts I have done recently – Total saved $28.

I have now found out who I need to speak to about getting a notice put in our Partner’s Post (the newsletter we are supposed to get from the army once a month that actually comes about once every 3 months and usually informs of supposed upcoming social events that have actually been and gone) so I can see if there are any other local mothers interested in joining a music and movement playgroup for their preschoolers. I have also done a lot of research on this and have a ton of ideas for the kids if there is enough interest.

I will leave you with some observations I have made recently, most of them are common sense and I already knew all of them yet have been inclined to ignore them. Maybe if I admit to some of these I will get them done/stop doing them:
1. if I write something down, especially here where anyone can see it, I am more likely to do it,
2. having a workout buddy really helps, even if they are in another country, you still feel less alone,
3. having a workout buddy in the same room is even better and makes you work harder,
4. almond butter is a great healthy snack when spread on apples, not when spread on chocolate,
5. it doesn’t matter that I choose to have my fish with spinach if I eat the left over chips from my son’s plate, the calories do not magically fall out in transit from his plate to my mouth,
6. the person who wrote the label for the agave nectar I bought has a really vivid imagination – 25% sweeter than sugar? Not in my cup of coffee it ain’t!

That is all for now but with A-man away soon I will have a catch up session and add the recipes for the new things I have tried over the last couple of weeks and add the photos of my binder and Mum’s mother’s day card.

Goals Update – Week 2 – Lesson: Learn to be your own Cheerleader

What is it about writing these updates that I dread so much? I have employed almost every procrastination ploy I know, short of actually doing any real work around the house, to avoid writing this – hence it being a day late. I probably should actually be working on the housework but then I guess I am using this as a procrastination tactic for that too.

I intend to make a few posts over the next couple of days, however it is this one that I am reluctant about. Maybe it is my need to succeed, not in general terms but is everything I do. If one aspect of my goal achievement is not up to scratch I have difficulty accepting my successes in other areas. I read a quote the other day that went like this… Sometimes people expose what is wrong with you because they can’t handle what is right about you… It was in a post on Facebook by a popular New Zealand personality and she was talking about not collecting the 1’s. That despite the fact that 299 love you it is the 1 that doesn’t that has the power to bring you down. Why is it that the love/admiration/respect of the 299 is not enough to stop the 1 from hurting? I think I need to add a new goal into my list:

15. Don’t collect the 1’s

I am my worst detractor too, I know it. I am not happy unless everything I do is exact. I also know that my reticence about this post stems from only one of my goals not going to plan. Somehow being slim or achieving a steady rate of weight loss has become the benchmark by which I measure all of my success. The crazy thing is I have only just completed week 2 of my set time frame and have already achieved more than in any other 2 week (or probably even 4 week) period of the past year.

After a week of birthday cake and being too busy to fit in much (read: any) exercise I am almost positive I have put on weight. Note here that I said “almost positive I have” not “have”. In an effort to not collect the 1’s I have resolutely avoided stepping on the scales. I don’t want to know what I weigh this week, I don’t want to let it bring me down, in fact I am not going to step on the scales again until the end of week 4! Instead I am going to focus on what I am doing well in other areas, work at fitting more physical activity into my day and consciously making healthy food choices.

Although I said I didn’t manage any exercise I did mow our lawns. I have never actually timed myself but I think it takes somewhere between 1.5 and 2 hours to do them. I split the job over 2 days and both times resulted in an elevated heart rate and a substantial glow (who am I kidding? I was sweating!) so I think that counts as a workout – I paid myself as though it was anyway. Current savings toward my new wardrobe – $11.00

I also listed a whole bunch of my stuff online but some of the auctions haven’t closed yet and the others haven’t had payment made so I can’t count them either. That means no change in my current debt status unfortunately. I will be listing more tonight though so hopefully the next 2 weeks (by the time payment is actually in my account) will show some significant improvement. It has been a very creative week though and along with the card I showed last week for my lovely Miss R I also made a similar card for my sister to go with her present (which I will make a post for this afternoon now that she has it) and made significant progress on my home management folders. They are at a stage now where I can show photos so I will post them as soon as I work out how to include a link to the sites I got my inspiration and printable inserts from – credit where credit is due I believe and as these were not my own creations I think that is only fair. I also have made a Mother’s Day card for my Mum but again I can’t show you this until she has it later this week.

There have also been a few new creations in the kitchen, some of them my own inventions too so I will post the recipes for those in the next couple of days. I will also include the recipe and photos for the birthday cake I made for Miss R’s first birthday celebration we held in the weekend. Most exciting though I have plans in the works to start a playgroup/music and movement group for my littlies and the other preschool kiddies in the Army housing area. Fingers crossed there are enough other Mums out there interested in joining as I really want this to work. My Mum started one for my sister when she was a baby and we were living in a small country town with nothing already set up. It was very cool and the kids loved it.

I think that is all to report this week in terms of goal progress. Reading back over what I have written above it doesn’t seem like much, but baby steps will get me there still and in my new determination to believe the 299 I am proud of what I have achieved!

cheer_ese