I am suffering from what my husband calls ‘paralysis by analysis’. It used to be his catch phrase when he was in property development and he was proud that he did not suffer from it. As he put it, he was able to make decisions without getting too bogged down with analysing all the myriads of information at his disposal, or as I see it, he is inclined to do things first and think about them later.
I am not like this… at all. Maybe he is right, maybe I do over think things. I am certainly feeling that way tonight and it irks me that it is over something so trivial. I have been saving jars and planning tea light lanterns for a very long time now, so long in fact that summer came and went without me getting them done (one of the rare downsides to making most of your food from scratch – no jars to re-use). Well we have now done enough visiting of family and friends (about the only times I can justify buying prepackaged baby food) that I have enough little jars to be getting my lanterns made. I have the lace I intend to use to decorate them, I have the paints I intend to use to colour the lace, I have the twine I will use to hang the finished pieces from our apple trees, yet I can’t seem to figure out which lace to use on which jars and exactly what shades I should make them. It is irksome, I am, well, irked!
The remarkable thing about all of this really is not my inability to decide how the finished product will look, my inefficacy in the decision-making area is already well established, rather that I am using housework as my form of procrastination. I have managed to convince myself that I absolutely can not start any painting or gluing or stringing until the house is tidy. Please do not be confused into thinking that this means there is any real housework being done here, there isn’t. Heaven forbid that any procrastination tactics of mine should actually result in something productive or useful but the thought is there. See, this is a new thing, maybe all this research (yes I am still calling it that) that I have done is starting to change the way I think… maybe tomorrow I will be inspired to actually clean something,,, maybe… well you never know, stranger things have happened!